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Welcome to The Ruby Element. [style] + [beauty] + [travel] + everything in between. I hope you enjoy your stay! x

[Your Dream vs. Reality]

[Your Dream vs. Reality]

You're human. You make some goals. Achieve some; but most likely, won't achieve them all. Sometimes a dose of reality is healthy for you. All these Tumblr and Pinterest posts telling you to float away and be a dreamer and dream big. Don't get me wrong, all these sayings do have a purpose and most of them are actually pretty damn motivational. But in the end, having a bit of logic, let's say structure in your life can develop that big dream into a much more attainable reality.

Most of my life, I've been a dreamer-- always imagining the grandiose life to be my own very soon. "Very soon." Another flaw in the dreamer system. What has to be done in order to achieve these goals are steps. Very meticulous, calculated, and yes, timely steps that must not be done in a rushed manner. As the saying goes, "Good things come to those who wait." Inspirational quote aside, what makes your dream a reality are creating very achievable mini-goals (goals within goals). This way, you are moving towards your goal without feeling overwhelmed, something that can delay your dreams becoming reality.

What I learned over my many years of mistakes is that when you set a certain expectation for someone or something, you will always be disappointed. What is most ideal is that you accept all possibilities. No one owes you anything and not all outcomes are positive. Being positive is good but being realistic is even better. What happens when you're realistic is that things that might affect your mood or emotions previously might now be seen as logical outcomes. Not everyone and everything will react the same and not setting these expectations will call for a much more pleasant road to achieving your dream.

When not so ideal outcomes happen, it's important to be emotionally ready to accept and move on from these losses. I like to write or take photos. Not that I'm the best writer or photographer in the world, but these two things calm me and make me feel human again. It brings me down to earth. Find something that calms you or makes you feel good and move on. Not everything will be sunshine and rainbows. That's where being realistic comes in handy.

Now what compelled me to write this you may ask? Not a what but many whats that brought this blog post to life. I would say every year I learn more and more about myself and this year was no different. I'm realizing as my blog is nearing its 2nd year in existence, I've done quite a lot and quite nothing at all. Quite frankly, time is scaring the shit out of me. Browsing through Facebook and looking at everyone getting engaged, married, having kids, or excelling in whatever career made me feel pretty confused about my own situation. What am I doing? Is this helpful to anyone? Shit, when am I getting married? But in the end, I conclude this. Not everyone's life is the same and goes at the same pace. So what if all my friends are getting married or making a killing in New York? I'm me and I am happy. I like what I'm doing and I'm happy where I am. I don't have to prove anything. I like doing things my way in my own time. The biggest mistake a twenty something can do is rush into anything because they feel like they need to. Develop your own sense of self and what you need to do in order to experience all the things you need to become the happy, healthy, beautiful, successful person that you are. Your whole life is ahead of you and you can't let what other people are doing disrupt your steady, happy path to making your dream into reality. 

So there you have it: a fool-proof way of changing your Pinterest boards and dream boards into something more tangible without getting discouraged. So be the captain of your own ship and make it happen! (Ha, I brought it back. Weren't you just wondering why I was using these set of photos though? A throwback with Ryan back when I still wandered the streets of Diamond Bar. Good times.)



Photos by Ryan Chua.


What I'm Wearing:

[Need Supply Beanie (old)]

[Karen Walker Sunnies]

[JYJZ Tank Dress (old)]

[DIY Denim Jacket]

[Random Leather Garter]

[Missguided Platform Shoes]


[Bliss Tulle Summer Lookbook]

[Bliss Tulle Summer Lookbook]

[Beach Day]

[Beach Day]